Here is how to lose weight. It's very simple. Most people won't do it because they're baby asses, but this is how it works.

1) Stop eating when you're walking.

2) Stop eating when you're shopping.

3) Stop eating at the movies.

4) Stop eating in the car.

5) Stop eating on the couch.

6) Stop eating while watching TV.

7) Stop watching TV. (Boom! Threw you for a loop there!)

8) Stop eating while reading.

9) Read more. ;)

10) Stop eating unless it's time to fucking eat.

When I state "eating" that also includes drinking anything other than water.

That's it. End of fucking list.